The Bryce is Right

NONSENSE SONGS

September 26, 2014 by TimBryce

BRYCE ON MUSIC

– It is interesting what we remember.

Ever drive along in a car and suddenly an old tune comes to your lips, perhaps something from your childhood? Recently, I found myself blurting out, “Boop boop dit-tem dat-tem what-tem Chu!” Frankly, I couldn’t remember the name of the song, which I found rather irritating. This caused me to look it up through an Internet search engine. Remarkably, it was:

“Three Little Fishes” (click for Lyrics)
This was introduced by Kay Kysor and featured Ish Kabibble. The words and music were by Saxie Dowell and the song was a US No. 1 hit in 1939. Here’s a sample of the lyrics:

Down in the meadow in a little bitty pool
Swam three little fishies and a mama fishie too
“Swim” said the mama fishie, “Swim if you can”
And they swam and they swam all over the dam
Boop boop dit-tem dat-tem what-tem Chu!
Boop boop dit-tem dat-tem what-tem Chu!
Boop boop dit-tem dat-tem what-tem Chu!
And they swam and they swam all over the dam

I cannot explain why I recollect this song as it certainly wasn’t from my generation. Perhaps I remember it as a song from childhood. Whatever the reason, I found it remarkable I could recall it. Actually, there are a lot of old-time songs cluttering our minds. They’re not particularly complicated, in fact they are rather simple with a catchy tune. We may not remember all of the words for these nonsense songs, as I call them, but we readily recognize the chorus. Let me give you a couple of other examples.

“Polly Wolly Doodle” – (click for Lyrics)

Oh, I went down South
For to see my Sal
Sing Polly wolly doodle all the day
My Sal, she is
A spunky gal
Sing Polly wolly doodle all the day

Fare thee well,
Fare thee well,
Fare thee well my fairy fay
For I’m going to Lou’siana
For to see my Susy-anna
Singing Polly wolly doodle all the day
(Copyright http://elyrics.net; click for Lyrics)

The song was first published in a Harvard student songbook in 1880. It was used in several movies, including Shirley Temple’s “The Littlest Rebel,” as well as “Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid.” This was another song I remember from childhood.

“I’ve Been Working on the Railroad” (click for Lyrics)
This is an old American folk song first published in 1894.

I’ve been working on the railroad
All the live-long day.
I’ve been working on the railroad
Just to pass the time away.
Can’t you hear the whistle blowing,
Rise up so early in the morn;
Can’t you hear the captain shouting,
“Dinah, blow your horn!”
Dinah, won’t you blow,
Dinah, won’t you blow,
Dinah, won’t you blow your horn?
Dinah, won’t you blow,
Dinah, won’t you blow,
Dinah, won’t you blow your horn?

I don’t know how I came to learn the lyrics for the song, but I did. Maybe it was in kindergarten or on a children’s television show.

“Ta-ra-ra Boom-de-ay” (click for Lyrics)
The song originated in the 1880’s. Although everyone knows the chorus, “Ta-ra-ra Boom-de-ay,” I do not know a soul who knows the rest. Even the chorus was bastardized to make a childish joke.

“Buffalo Gals” (click for Lyrics)
This was published back in 1844 by a gentleman named John Hodges. The song was a favorite in western movies, particularly on pianos in saloons. It was also used in Frank Kapra’s iconic movie, “It’s a Wonderful Life,” where George (Jimmy Stewart) and Mary (Donna Reed) sing it as a duet. It was also used as the theme song for the movie. The chorus should be familiar to a lot of people:

Buffalo gals, won’t you come out tonight?
Come out tonight, Come out tonight?
Buffalo gals, won’t you come out tonight,
And dance by the light of the moon.

“Skip to my Lou” (click for Lyrics)
This song dates back at least to the early 19th century, maybe earlier. The song was used in early square dancing and may have originated in Scotland (“Lou” is Scottish for “Love”). “Skip” meant trade partners on the dance floor. The chorus was quite simple:

Skip, skip, skip to my Lou, (3x)
Skip to my Lou, my darlin’.

“Jimmy Crack Corn”
Originated in the 1840’s, probably in the South. Like the rest of the songs herein, we knew the chorus well, but not the rest of the piece.

Jim crack corn I don’t care,
Jim crack corn I don’t care,
Jim crack corn I don’t care,

When I looked this one up, I was surprised to see it was quite racist by today’s standards. So much so, I hesitate to include them herein (you can look it up yourself).

I find the durability of these songs interesting, even though we know them primarily by their chorus lines.

“Daisy Bell” (click for Lyrics)
A classic from the “Gay 90’s” was “Daisy Bell” as composed in 1892 by Harry Dacre. It was made particularly popular in the modern era movie, “2001: A Space Odyssey,” whereby the spaceship’s computer, the HAL 9000, attempts a mutiny and must be shutdown. As it fails, it reverts back to an old song it was taught by its instructor, “Daisy Bell.” The chorus is still familiar to a lot of people:

Daisy, Daisy,
Give me your answer do!
I’m half crazy,
All for the love of you!
It won’t be a stylish marriage,
I can’t afford a carriage
But you’ll look sweet upon the seat
Of a bicycle made for two.

“Witch Doctor” (click for Lyrics)
Produced by David Seville and the Chipmunks in 1958, it became a kid classic over night, primarily due to its chorus of, “Oo ee oo ah ah ting tang walla walla bing bang.” The song did so well, it went on to become number one on the Billboard Hot 100.

“High Hopes” (click for Lyrics)
This became a popular Frank Sinatra song written by Jimmy Van Heusen and lyrics by Sammy Cahn in 1959 for the film, “A Hole in the Head.”

Next time your found, with your chin on the ground
There a lot to be learned, so look around

Just what makes that little old ant
Think he’ll move that rubber tree plant
Anyone knows an ant, can’t
Move a rubber tree plant

But he’s got high hopes, he’s got high hopes
He’s got high apple pie, in the sky hopes

So any time your gettin’ low
‘Stead of lettin’ go
Just remember that ant
Oops there goes another rubber tree plant

The song became incredibly popular not just with grownups, but with children as well.

None of these tunes were particularly complicated, just simple songs to brighten our day. These were not children’s rhymes but legitimate adult songs that were playful in nature. Their strength was in their catchy wordplay. More than anything, they were designed for simple fun, and not to make a statement of any kind. As such, they tend to stay with you longer than you think. The fact I was humming, “Boop boop dit-tem dat-tem what-tem Chu!” over fifty years after I learned it should denote its durability.

It’s interesting how we clutter our minds. Besides, they were all the “Bee’s Knees!”

Keep the Faith!

Note: All trademarks both marked and unmarked belong to their respective companies.

Tim Bryce is a writer and the Managing Director of M&JB Investment Company (M&JB) of Palm Harbor, Florida and has over 30 years of experience in the management consulting field. He can be reached at timb001@phmainstreet.com

For Tim’s columns, see:
timbryce.com

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NEXT UP: WHO HAS GOT YOUR BACK? – A lesson of loyalty in the workplace, and in life.

LAST TIME: THE MEANING OF TRAITOR – Another history lesson for our youth; Benedict Arnold and today’s terrorists.

Listen to Tim on WJTN-AM (News Talk 1240) “The Town Square” with host John Siggins (Mon, Wed, Fri, 12:30-3:00pm Eastern), and KIT-AM 1280 in Yakima, Washington “The Morning News” with hosts Dave Ettl & Lance Tormey (weekdays. 6:00-9:00am Pacific). Or tune-in to Tim’s channel on YouTube.

Retirementland

September 5, 2014 by TimBryce

BRYCE ON LIFE

– Do we ever truly retire?

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I have written about retirement in the past and I still regard it as a mystery. I have had more friends “check out” recently for a variety of reasons. They all claim to be happy to be retired, that they have been planning it for years, and that I am a chump to keep working. I consider this all a bald-faced lie. I’ve seen some become musicians, where they play pickup gigs. I’ve seen others become golfers, playing the same course over and over again like a gerbil on a treadmill. And they all seem to be obsessed with Viagra or Cialis for some reason.

Perhaps the hardest part to retirement is adjusting to the pace. At first, most men treat it like a vacation, but they quickly learn it is a vacation that never ends. Initially, they tend to get more rest, eat a little more than they should, take a trip, putter around the house tackling minor assignments, but then they become bored and restless. Instead of having someone set a schedule for them, like their company and boss, now they have to make their own schedule.

Retirement seems to turn executives into gardeners where they spend countless hours turning their property into lush Japanese gardens. At parties, they argue who has the best “Shishi-odoshi” in their “Koi” ponds to scare away deer. I also think they learn the language as part of this process. They have been known to blurt out words and expressions like, “Hai,” “non desu ka,” “Ohayou gozaimasu,” “douzo,” and “domo.”

Some prefer cultivating vegetable gardens, complete with bib overalls and a straw hat. Somehow I am reminded of Eddie Albert. Tomatoes, corn, and cucumbers are common. The more ambitious farmers try their hand at such things as kale, cabbage, bok choy, okra, snow peas, and a variety of hot peppers. Normally, these are tried only once before reverting back to tomatoes, corn, and cucumbers. For some strange reason, broccoli is avoided at all costs.

At high school reunions I would hear classmates boast they were going to retire soon. They do this in such a way as to make it sound like a game, whereby the winner is the person who retires first. They looked forward to sleeping in during the mornings, travel to exotic locations, or catch up on their reading. Inevitably, they find their body is conditioned to sleep a few scant hours and they still rise before sunup, they rarely travel outside of the county, and the only reading they do is in the bathroom. If anything, they become addicted to television shows like “Jerry Springer,” “The View,” and “Dr. Phil.” Not surprising, they develop the habit of talking back to the television screen as if the host could hear them. The only thing stranger is when they offer applause to the television set.

The retirees start attending breakfasts and lunches with former colleagues. Inevitably old war stories are told over and over again. Breakfast usually consists of eggs, bacon, pork sausage, goetta, scrapple, pancakes, biscuits and gravy, grits, hash browns, and coffee, lots of coffee. Lunches usually includes pastrami, corned beef, hamburgers, chicken wings, and an occasional glass of beer or wine. It is no small wonder they begin to gain weight. There is also the ceremonial toothpick afterwards. They suddenly find themselves volunteering time to charitable organizations and political campaigns. And they spend an inordinate amount of time in doctor offices, where they develop an interest in women magazines.

Retirees discover they miss the socialization they enjoyed at work, which is why they gravitate to group meetings. They realize it is important to their mental health to be able to discuss current events and their observations on life. Without such discussions they become despondent.

To keep busy, it is not unusual for them to go to the post office, not just once, but twice a day (once in the morning and later in the afternoon). They also go for haircuts at dawn. Rarely do they really need a haircut as their hair is now thin. More importantly, it is to manicure the wild hairs growing in their eyebrows, ears, and nose. They also spend considerable time at sporting events for their grandchildren, where they can catch up on their sleep.

More importantly, I’ve noticed my friends who recently retired get bored easily. Although they pledged to live a life of ease, one by one I see them all going back to take on a job of some kind. Maybe not as rigorous as before, but necessary to practice mental gymnastics. I’ve seen some people become clerks at some of the home and garden superstores, others work at golf courses, and some go back to what they were doing before retiring. Frankly, I do not know anyone who has dropped out completely. Somehow, they all find a way to go back to work. Maybe retirement is not what they thought it would be.

In spite of all this, I am considered the “oddball” for continuing to work. I still enjoy meeting and working with people; I still enjoy jousting in debate, but more than anything, I still believe I have a role to play and am not ready for the curtain to fall. Besides, I look kind of silly wearing a hardware store apron.

For more on Retirement, see:
Retirement
Retirement Breakdown
What? Me Retire?

Keep the Faith!

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For Tim’s columns, see:
timbryce.com

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Excuses

August 29, 2014 by TimBryce

BRYCE ON LIFE

– Why are the trucks breaking down?

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Down here in Florida we have a lot of problems with trucks breaking down, particularly those used for delivery or maintenance. It seems every time you make an appointment with a driver to drop something off or a workman who is scheduled to perform a task for you, they can never seem to be there on time and blame the truck for breaking down. Does this happen elsewhere in the country or is it something unique to Florida?

By my estimate, all of our roads should be littered with truck parts strewn everywhere. No wonder Detroit needs a bailout since it appears they no longer know how to make a workable truck anymore, nor do the Japanese, Koreans, or Germans. I would love to be in the truck repair business as they must be making a mint.

“No Tim, you don’t get it; there is nothing wrong with the trucks, they’re just using this as an excuse.”

Really? Gee, why can’t they just call and reschedule? That would be more respectful of the customer who wouldn’t waste time waiting on an air head who is probably going to do a ding-dong job for you anyway.

Maybe its just me, but I tend to have more respect for a person who admits a mistake as opposed to fabricating an excuse. After all, who does he think he is fooling? Me? Hardly. In our culture we tend to look at the admission of a mistake as a sign of weakness. I don’t. To me, it’s an admission that a person knows his/her limitations and is asking for help. I would rather know this as soon as possible as opposed to waiting for a calamity to strike and suffering the consequences thereof. It is a Bryce’s Law that, “The longer you delay admitting a mistake, the more expensive it will be to correct.”

Think about this, which is worse – the mistake or the excuse? It’s the excuse, right? After all, it’s only masking a mistake and means you are wasting precious time trying to uncover it. What’s so terribly wrong with admitting, “I screwed up” (I would use something stronger, but you get the idea). This is like saying, “I’m human.” I learned a long time ago that nobody is perfect, least of all myself; and, as humans, we all make mistakes in our walk through life. It is inevitable. It bothers me though that we tend to cover it up as opposed to admitting we have a problem. Consider this, the last guy who was perfect, they hung on a cross.

So, you have a choice, if you’re going to be late for that appointment or have a problem fulfilling an obligation, don’t fabricate an excuse; let me know ahead of time so I can plan accordingly. Either that or fix the damn truck!

Keep the Faith!

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For Tim’s columns, see: timbryce.com

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The Elements of Leadership

June 18, 2014 by TimBryce

BRYCE ON MANAGEMENT

– Is it as easy as one, two, three?

I have always contended leadership is an essential trait to become an effective manager. Whenever I mention this, many people disagree and claim it has nothing to with management whatsoever, which is perceived as nothing more than overseeing the activities of others. In this instance, I believe they are confusing supervision for management; the two are certainly not synonymous, yet I concede many of today’s managers tend to practice a Theory X form of micromanagement whereby the supervisor makes all of the decisions for the workers top-down. In contrast, I believe managers should manage more and supervise less, representing a bottom-up approach whereby employees are trained, delegated responsibility and allowed to conquer projects without someone breathing down their necks. From this perspective, management is substantially different than supervision.

From my experience, there are three essential elements for leadership:

* Must be able to read a map – meaning they have a sense of direction about them or what used to be called “vision.” Not only does the person know where to go, but how to get there. This usually means the person is better educated or is highly proficient in certain skills enabling the person to conquer problems.

* Confidence – whether it be true or fabricated (aka “bluff”), the person exudes self-confidence in how to succeed, thereby creating believers and followers. True confidence is preferred as opposed to fake which may lead people down the wrong path, thereby causing them to lose respect for the leader. Workers need to believe the manager knows the proper course of action for success.

* Strong interpersonal skills – to articulate objectives, review plans, delegate responsibility, and review progress. A good leader knows how to motivate workers, whether through communications or by example. Such skills requires some industrial psychology to properly motivate people. A sense of politics doesn’t hurt either.

Some of the best managers I’ve met over the years possessed these three basic elements. The good ones though are also not afraid to admit when they are unsure of themselves and smart enough to seek the counsel of others. Failure to do so has caused managers to go into a self-destruct mode.

Finally, let us be mindful that not to lead is to follow. Today, we are hearing a lot about “leading from behind,” not just in government, but in business as well. This is a disastrous trait in a manager. It means you are more willing to follow than to lead. If you are paid to lead, lead; if you are paid to follow, follow, but do not ever confuse the two.

Keep the Faith!

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When a Trust is Broken

May 5, 2014 by TimBryce

BRYCE ON SOCIETY

– What should you do? Forgive or reciprocate?

There is perhaps nothing more demoralizing to the human spirit than discovering a broken trust. What makes this particularly painful is when a person believes another has his/her best interests in mind and will defend them. This can be between two friends, business associates, school, in sports, in politics, or even within families. Inevitably one or both parties are surprised, thereby creating resentment and a rift between people inevitably ensues. If a lie is discovered, a promise broken, cheating, not being treated fairly, playing politics, an insult, or whatever, it can do irreparable harm. You may forgive, but you will never forget and it is unlikely you will ever treat that person the same.

We deal with such indiscretions in our own unique way, some through anger, some through humor, some through reciprocal action, or some simply ignore it. Frankly, I do not understand the latter alternative. I realize some people may violate a trust simply to get nothing more than a reaction from a person, which is perhaps the worst reason for violating a trust. However, the violation is plain and simply an insult to your honor and should be dealt with accordingly.

“Don’t get mad, get even.” I am not suggesting you stoop to the level of the person committing the indiscretion, but to simply return the favor more effectively than your antagonist. One way is to publicize the foul thereby discrediting the other person. Another is to report the person’s actions to the proper authorities, possibly even taking it to court. Aside from committing a similar foul to the other party, which I do not necessarily recommend, another option is to simply withdraw from the institution and leave the offender to his own devices. Understand this, by breaking the trust, the offender has already exhibited his feelings towards you. Forgive if you want, but the other person should instigate the healing process. Obviously, some things can never be forgiven.

I had a friend from Brazil who moved to the United States and was surprised by our dependency on lawyers to solve numerous petty offenses. When I asked him how he would handle someone who had cheated him, he replied he would simply throw a brick through his company’s front window. He rationalized it would probably cost the company more to replace the window as opposed to paying him back. I’m not sure I would agree with his approach but I certainly can understand his sentiments.

Whatever approach you use, first and foremost have confidence in yourself. Stand your ground and do not reduce yourself to the other person’s level. Some people go into a state of shock when the indiscretion initially occurs. They do not necessarily think clearly. Just simply take note of the facts involved with the situation, such as the time, date, place it occurred, and the people involved. Think through the problem, and devise a suitable solution. Regardless if it is forgiveness or retribution, consider the ramifications before deciding on a course of action.

This reminds me of the animosity between George Bernard Shaw, the famous playwright, and Winston Churchill. The two hated each other. Just prior to the opening of one of Shaw’s plays, he sent an insulting note to Churchill, “I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; bring a friend… if you have one.”

Churchill had the last laugh though by responding to Shaw, “Cannot possibly attend first night; will attend second, if there is one.”

Samuel Clemons (Mark Twain) came up with an interesting approach for clearing out the riff-raft in his life; he sent an anonymous telegram to a dozen of his friends saying, “flee at once – all is discovered.” They all left town immediately.

When someone breaks the trust, be sure to return the favor and do it with a little class.

Keep the Faith!

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For Tim’s columns, see: timbryce.com

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The Age of Darkness

March 19, 2014 by TimBryce

BRYCE ON SOCIETY

– Are we still seeking truth and knowledge, or are we pacified by the status quo?

The “Age of Enlightenment” was a period beginning in the 17th century where people began to question the status quo through discussion and reason. This led to many scientific discoveries and fueled the arts simply because people were encouraged to challenge the status quo and exchange ideas. Such discourse was made possible through free speech and the proliferation of the printing press thereby providing a convenient means to record ideas and convey information. Freemasons also had a role to play in this, although historians might argue otherwise, by providing a venue for the thinkers of the day to meet and talk. Some of the principals of this movement included Voltaire, Montesquieu, Franklin, Jenner, Mesmer, Mozart, Haydn, and Frederick the Great, all of which were Freemasons in search of knowledge. Many others followed and by doing so the arts and sciences were revolutionized, new trade routes were explored, new countries were colonized and founded, commerce and agriculture flourished, and political reforms enacted. It was an inspiring period.

Compare it to the last 100 years where we have witnessed great changes in transportation, business, communications, medicine, and other technologies. We have explored space and landed men on the moon, multiple times. Along the way, we have also been forced to endure several wars around the globe, and survive economic catastrophes. Today, our space program is a mere shadow of itself, our military has been reduced in size to the era of pre-World War II, a religious powder keg still exists in the Middle East, the nation’s economy can be described as fragile at best, and we are still dependent on other countries for energy. We have also witnessed some not so subtle changes in our government and the media, suppressing the exchange of ideas, thereby challenging our freedoms. The Age of Enlightenment has been replaced by paranoia. Others now dictate what is proper for discussion and enforced by the spin of the media or by autocratic rule. Political correctness tempers our tongues and forces people to accept the status quo. Even the Masons now fear censorship for discussing subjects not approved by their grand jurisdictions.

Today, we could convincingly argue we are embroiled in an “Age of Darkness” where people are forced to go underground to whisper their views and ideas. Bureaucratic rule and excessive laws are aimed at regulating the behavior of people, not to protect their freedoms. Is such rule needed to control an overly populated planet, or is it nothing more than a zeal for domination? I suspect the latter. Instead of being allowed to ask questions, we are now expected to accept everything at face value by the government and the media. This does not bode well for people seeking enlightenment. I can appreciate the need for secrecy on certain matters, but I value candor more, where we seek and learn the truth as opposed to being treated like cattle.

When “Duck Dynasty” star Phil Robertson made his views about morality known in an interview for GQ magazine, including homosexuality, the media called it “shocking,” thereby causing A&E, the network for the show, to suspend him indefinitely. Fans of the show rebelled and forced A&E to lift the suspension. This was not the first time Robertson butted heads with A&E executives who bleeped “in Jesus’ name” during his prayers. This is a prime example of how expression is repressed in this day and age.

Enlightenment represents our thirst for discovery, invention and innovation, and to “boldly go where no man has gone before.” In order to continue our quest for enlightenment, freedom must be safeguarded, particularly the rights of the individual. It cannot succeed under a regime of repression, where Big Brother is watching our every move, listening to our every word, and judging our political correctness. The governing powers understand it is difficult to control people who possess the thirst for knowledge and expression. Consequently, they create an environment to restrain the human mind. Criticisms and different viewpoints are no longer tolerated, just blind faith. New ideas or methodologies for improving the human condition are also not acceptable, just the status quo.

So, where can the thirst for enlightenment be found? Certainly not in our schools where students are only encouraged to memorize facts, not to think for themselves or learn to speak their mind. This makes them more manageable. The thirst can only be found in those who truly appreciate the need for freedom and are willing to fight for it; that we do not simply want enlightenment, but resist all efforts to repress it.

Enlightenment represents hope, and darkness our demise. Enlightenment represents freedom, and darkness our enslavement. Our predecessors were cognizant of this, but I fear too many people today have found comfort in the darkness of the status quo. As for me, I vote for enlightenment.

I wonder what our founding fathers would say. In today’s world they would have likely been rounded up, their properties confiscated, and hung in public before they could have written one word of the Declaration of Independence. Such is the fate of those resisting the Age of Darkness.

Keep the Faith!

Note: All trademarks both marked and unmarked belong to their respective companies.

For Tim’s columns, see:
timbryce.com

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Listen to Tim on WJTN-AM (News Talk 1240) “The Town Square” with host John Siggins (Mon, Wed, Fri, 12:30-3:00pm Eastern), KIT-AM 1280 in Yakima, Washington “The Morning News” with hosts Dave Ettl & Lance Tormey (weekdays. 6:00-9:00am Pacific), and KGAB-AM (650) of Cheyenne, Wyoming. Or tune-in to Tim’s channel on YouTube.

2013 Year End Wrap-Up

December 30, 2013 by TimBryce

My most popular columns this year.
BRYCE ON 2013

As you know, I write on a variety of subjects, such as management, systems, technology, social issues, politics, and observations of our changing world. Sometimes my work is instructional and informative, other times it is controversial or humorous. I certainly hope it isn’t boring. By the number of subscribers I have, their comments, and the hits I have on my web site, I do not believe this is the case.

For my year-end column, I decided to look at my statistics and see which were my most popular articles and speculate on their popularity. Herein, therefore, are my “greatest hits” for 2013.

THE REMINGTON RAND ADDING MACHINE, MODEL 41013-10

This was written in December 2012 as a fun piece describing our ancient adding machine, marveling at its simplicity, and questioning why people tend to discard office equipment as opposed to maintaining it (in our case, for 42 years and still chugging away). I was surprised by the thousands of people who read it. It caused several of my subscribers to reminisce about such equipment. Typical comments included, “Sure wish most items would last nearly as long,” and “Yeah! They sure don’t build things to last any more.”

TEN THINGS THE FEDERAL GOVERNMENT DOES WELL

Written in June of last year, people from around the world read this article on a daily basis. Overseas, Europeans reference this piece regularly, particularly people in the United Kingdom. In an age where we tend to believe government is incompetent, my article piqued people’s curiosity as to whether government can do anything right. I also received considerable reader feedback on this one, including a woman from West Virginia who wrote, “It has come to the point that I no longer believe a word the government says. I don’t trust the media either.”

STAND UP FOR MORALITY (PART 1 OF 8)

Beginning last April, I published an eight part series encouraging people to think about and openly discuss morality in our society. This, of course, became my book, “Stand Up for MORALITY!” The comments from my readers were encouraging. The subject became a hot button topic on the Internet and caused me to produce a presentation on the subject.

WHAT IF THE SOUTH HAD WON THE WAR?

I originally wrote this column in December of 2011, but it is still actively read on a daily basis. The article considered what our world might look like today if General Lee had won at Gettysburg and captured Washington, DC. This stirred the imagination of a lot of readers who commented accordingly.

BRYCE’S LAWS – MINI POSTERS

Earlier this year I devised a series of mini-posters based on our popular “Bryce’s Laws” which are axioms on life, both personal and professional. Four posters were made available, including: Life, Management, Information Systems, and Project Management. These small posters can now be found in offices and cubicles around the world.

TODAY’S SLAVE MENTALITY

This was another piece I wrote towards the end of last December. Like the others, it has been frequently read all year. Basically, it is a comparison of today’s welfare state versus the the early American slaves. Although it was considered controversial, I received a lot of positive comments from my readers.

PRINT ON-DEMAND (POD) – VERY COOL

This was a technology related piece I wrote describing an interesting means to publish a book. Although it requires an author to be savvy in desktop publishing, it is a great way to free yourself of the yolk of publishers. Someone at Amazon should be thanking me for writing this.

LIBERAL VS. CONSERVATIVE PERSONALITIES

This has been a favorite subject of mine for quite some time. It examines how people develop their political beliefs, e.g., Why does a person become a Democrat or a Republican? This generated considerable discussion from my readers. Bottom-line, I think I was on to something in terms of people’s personalities ultimately dictating their political preferences.

WHO IS TEACHING MORALITY?

This article described the various factions who are truly teaching moral values in this country, regrettably it is not the parents.

THE DEATH OF PROFESSIONAL COURTESY

This column was touched off by an incident I experienced at a company whereby I observed how people treated others callously. This too resulted in considerable feedback from my readers who experienced similar situations. Regrettably, I am seeing more and more of this in the corporate world.

AMERICAN MORAL DILEMMAS

The article was a precursor to my series on morality. Basically, it contrasted the moral values of capitalism versus socialism.

In terms of my columns, 2013 will probably be best remembered as my “Morality Year,” where I openly questioned the values of our culture, particularly how they are formed and taught. I consider the erosion of our morality in this country a serious problem, something that may very well lead to our demise. Maybe I’m an alarmist, or maybe I am seeing something people are glossing over. I have always believed in the Bryce’s Law, “You cannot treat a patient if he doesn’t know he is sick.” Since I started researching this subject, I found morality is something most people take for granted and never discuss. This is why I found it important to bring this to the attention of my readers. I just hope people were listening.

I want to thank all of my readers who commented on my columns this year, both in print and on the radio. Although I may not have time to respond to everyone, rest assured I read all of your comments, both good and bad. Thank you. It’s nice to know people are listening.

Happy New Year.

Keep the Faith!

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For Tim’s columns, see:
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Listen to Tim on WJTN-AM (News Talk 1240) “The Town Square” with host John Siggins (Mon, Wed, Fri, 12:30-3:00pm Eastern), KGAB-AM 650 “The Morning Zone” with host Dave Chaffin (weekdays, 6:00-10:00am Mountain), and KIT-AM 1280 in Yakima, Washington “The Morning News” with hosts Dave Ettl & Lance Tormey (weekdays. 6:00-9:00am Pacific). Or tune-in to Tim’s channel on YouTube.

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The Meaning of Christmas

December 23, 2013 by TimBryce

BRYCE ON CHRISTMAS
It is certainly not about the commercialization of the holiday, or Santa.

He arose in the morning groggy and disoriented. He didn’t know where he was or recognized the surroundings. It was a small room, very neat and clean, with a sofa, desk, and big bed. Anyone would recognize it as a hotel with all of the amenities. He had no memory of how he had gotten there. Sunlight peeked between the curtains. The television was playing a Christmas gala, complete with classic holiday music. The entertainment was broken up by the occasional commercial where announcers were promoting everything from toys to clothes, jewels, and automobiles. Each announcer admonished viewers to hurry as there was just one day until Christmas.

“Christmas? Where am I, where have I been?”

He slowly stood up and went over to the window and opened the curtains to look outside where the grass and roads were covered with a thin layer of snow. It was cold, but not frigid. People could be seen walking on the streets carrying packages, cars moved quickly along a boulevard, and pine trees were adorned with tinsel, bulbs and lights. He didn’t recognize any of it which confused matters further.

He washed himself in the bathroom and then spotted some clothes neatly folded on the sofa, complete with shoes and socks. The clothes fit remarkably well. The shoes, which were actually a set of leather and rubber boots, also fit comfortably. He combed his hair before putting on the jacket and wool cap hanging on the chair at the desk. He unlocked the door and stepped outside into the cold air and surveyed the area around the hotel. Nothing looked familiar; did Europe look like this?

A woman dressed in a heavy black coat passed by him and greeted him good morning.

It was English, but the accent wasn’t recognizable. He replied, “Good morning,” to the woman who hurried away before any other questions could be asked.

He watched her hurry down the street heading towards a large building where several cars were already parked. A sign in front read, “Springdale Town Mall.” He was curious and thought people at the building might hold some answers. So He followed the woman to the mall, crossing the street carefully as it was busy with vehicles. The traffic lights seemed strange to Him, as well as the lines on the street, along with the the commotion of the cars and their horns. As He approached the entrance to the mall, He could hear the sounds of Christmas music coming from the mall’s PA system in the parking lot. In between songs, announcers touted their products and admonished shoppers there was just one more day until Christmas. He really didn’t grasp what was going on.

He entered the mall which was the largest structure He had ever seen. Inside was a cavernous multitude of lights, more music, and thousands of people circulating. There seemed to be hundreds of shops offering a variety of wares; toys, cutlery, sporting goods, jewelry, and many other goods. Virtually all had signs in their windows promoting sales and reminding shoppers there was now less than a day to Christmas. He paused by an electronic store where many television sets were displaying Christmas shows. The shows were mesmerizing and He became somewhat intoxicated by the sights and sounds emanating from the televisions.

He wandered the mall examining the various stores carefully. Each was decorated in red and green colors, with wreaths, and the smell of pine and sweet candy hung in the air. Electric lights, snowmen, and miniature railroads offered animation. Gifts were wrapped in a special type of green and red paper and ribbons. All in all, it was a feeding frenzy of shopping. He wondered what the purpose of all this activity. There were several signs mentioning “Christmas,” but He didn’t make the connection.

There was the smell of food in the air which caused His stomach to growl in hunger. He passed the mall’s Food Court which featured several restaurants offering a variety of strange looking ethnic foods. He watched cooks prepare Japanese sushi and Chinese cuisine, none of which He recognized as something edible. The Mexican restaurant smelled of spicy hot peppers. The only restaurants which somehow resembled familiar food was the Italian restaurant, although He balked at pizza, and the Greek restaurant featuring gyros and souvlakis, both offered on pita bread.

He asked the clerk for a gyro as it appeared to be made of lamb. The young clerk prepared the meal accordingly, complete with French Fries and a cola drink.

“That will be $5 for the gyro special,” she said.

He looked perplexed by her request but quickly figured she was asking for money of which He had none. He tapped his trousers with his hand and heard the distinct click of metal. He reached inside his pocket where He retrieved some coins valued at $2 each. “Will you take these?” He asked.

The clerk took three of them and presented him with a $1 bill saying, “Here is your change. Thank you. Next!…”

He walked away from the restaurant with his tray and found an empty table to sit and eat. He studied the $1 bill carefully. He had never seen paper money before and didn’t recognize Washington’s portrait. He ate the gyro hungrily. He enjoyed the taste of cooked lamb as well as the pita bread. The French Fries seemed peculiar to him though. He picked one up and inspected it carefully. Nearby at other tables, people were eating them. He then broke one in half and tasted it, and it was good, even though He didn’t know what it was. “A French Fry? Hmm…,” and He ate the rest. He examined the cola drink suspiciously. He took a sip and found the taste medicinal in nature, and the bubbles tickled His nose. Spotting a nearby water fountain, He emptied the cola down its drain and replaced it with water which tasted remarkably clean to Him.

He saw others dumping the trash from their trays into the garbage and followed suit. The meal had served its purpose and He felt refreshed. He then returned to wandering around the mall. The music and hubbub was beginning to give Him a small headache.

It was mid afternoon when He came to the center of the mall where He sat at a bench on the second floor. He marveled at the immensity of the mall and as He looked down to the bottom floor He discovered a long line of children waiting for someone named “Santa Claus.” Dozens of children waited patiently to sit with a fat man dressed in a red and white costume. He assumed the man was elderly as he wore a white beard with matching color hair.

An elderly woman came and sat on the bench to rest her feet. She was loaded with several packages and looked tired from her trek around the mall.

“Excuse me, but who is that man down there?” He innocently asked the woman.

She looked down to see the object of His attention.

“Are you kidding me?” she said, “It’s Santa Claus and his elves talking to the kids of course.”

He said, “I’m sorry, I am not from around here. What is a Santa Claus?”

She looked at him inquisitively but gave him the benefit of doubt. “He is actually called by many names, St. Nicholas, Kris Kringle, and many others around the world. He is considered the patron saint of Christmas and is best known for delivering presents to children on Christmas.”

“Christmas, there is that name again,” He thought.

He watched the children one-by-one visit with the old gentleman. Some appeared timid and scared, others enjoyed a good conversation with the man, others were loud and animated, demanding certain presents on Christmas Day. It was all rather unclear as to the purpose of the meeting with Santa other than it was an outlet to promote the purchase of more gifts. He was amazed by the length of the never-ending line and requests for more gifts.

The greed and opulence of the season was too much for him to stomach any longer. He took his leave of the mall wanting to head back to the safety of the hotel room. Unfortunately, He became a bit disoriented and couldn’t find the same door from which He entered, and exited on the opposite end of the mall where nothing looked familiar.

He had spent considerable time at the mall and it was now late afternoon with long shadows and the sun beginning to set. All He could see were rows of neat wooden homes adjacent to the mall. He was unfamiliar with the architecture and wanted to take a closer look. He entered a subdivision and was amazed how orderly the houses were aligned and well maintained.

As the sun set, decorative lights were switched on and lit up the houses and the adjacent trees and shrubbery. Various statues of snowmen, Santa Claus, and angels were also lit and music could be heard in the air. There also seemed to be reindeer everywhere; on top of houses, pulling sleighs, or metallic statues on front lawns, some were animated appearing to be grazing. In was very reminiscent of the storefronts in the mall.

He walked several blocks in amazement as the houses turned darkness into light. Other people also walked the neighborhood in order to see the decorations. Cars began to enter the streets where they moved slowly so parents and children could admire the decorations. As pleasant as this all ways, He was at a loss as to what it all meant.

As He exited the neighborhood, He was presented with two large structures, one with a crucifix atop it, and another with the Star of David. He was appalled by the crucifix and began to wonder if people still practiced the tortuous custom. The large cross stopped Him in his tracks and He began to tremble. He noticed the other structure bore the Shield of David, a symbol He was familiar with through Judaism.

It was nighttime now and both buildings were active with people, the Temple celebrating a Bar Mitzvah, and the Church preparing to celebrate Christmas mass. Being more familiar with the Shield of David, He approached the Temple, where people were exiting for the evening. Still inside was the rabbi who was bidding goodnight to the attendees. He worked his way to the rabbi, a middle aged man who appeared to be of good nature.

He said, “Rabbi, I am a stranger to this area. As I have walked around the village I notice there is a fascination with ‘Christmas’ here. I would like to know more.”

The Rabbi smiled and said, “Well stranger, you are actually in a good place to learn. I would like to sit down and tell you more, but the hour is late and I have another appointment. However, I recommend you visit the church next door where they are getting ready to celebrate Christmas. I am confident they will tell you the full story tonight.”

He took his leave of the rabbi, who locked the Temple after He exited. Many people were entering the house of the crucifix, men, women and children. As it appeared to be safe, He overcame his timidity and reluctantly approached the church. At the door, He was warmly welcomed by greeters. The inside appeared to be a place for religious retreats, with several rows of pews, and an altar at the front.

As the service began, the congregation rose to its feet and began to sing, accompanied by an organ. He was startled by this, but found the music strangely comforting. He looked about and saw everyone singing in unison, along with a choir which sang as one. The pomp and circumstance was impressive. He looked on in horror as a small boy walked slowly down the center aisle carrying another crucifix with an effigy of a person nailed to it. The boy proudly presented the cross at the front of the congregation before placing it in a stand. He was bewildered by the display and was prepared to turn and run, but something inside him told him to stand his ground. After the entrance of the clergy, the music stopped and everyone returned to their seats.

The minister welcomed everyone to the evening’s Christmas celebration. This was followed by a sweet celebration enacted by the children of the church who were dressed in colorful costumes. The minister narrated the story of the birth of Christ and the children acted out the story. He listened intently. He heard the names of Joseph and Mary, which were well known to him, as well as a place called Galilee. He listened to their story of the birth of their savior. Aside from the shiny costumes and some obvious literary liberties, it was a story He knew well, and his spirits perked up noticeably. He was no longer afraid but felt quite at home.

After the play, the minister asked all first time visitors to rise and be recognized. One-by-one he welcomed each visitor, asking who they were and where they were from. The minister finally asked the stranger to introduce himself.

“I am known as Jesus of Nazareth,” He said.

The minister thought He was mocking the congregation and quickly confronted the stranger. Anger was in the minister’s eyes but before he could utter a harsh word, He said, “I am a stranger to this area,” and raised his hand in peace to shake the minister’s.

It was only then the minister saw the scars from the crucifixion. There was something in the stranger’s demeanor and eyes that made him realize he was now in the presence of something special. The minister froze until He placed his hands on him in comfort. The minister smiled and knelt to his knees. The congregation didn’t quite comprehend the situation, but followed the minister’s lead and knelt.

He said, “Please rise, you are all my children. I’m not sure why I was sent here but I believe it has something to do with the meaning of Christmas, something I didn’t quite understand until I witnessed your pageant.”

“Yes, this is your birthday, your eminence,” the minister replied.

“I have been among you this day and have witnessed many things, most of which I do not understand, particularly the greed of this day. I hope they are not using this day to celebrate such a weakness.”

The minister was embarrassed, “I am afraid a lot of people have forgotten its purpose. It is not about shopping, it’s about You.”

“In my time, we celebrated birthdays by the breaking of the bread. We didn’t have opulent presents. Instead, we offered our love, fellowship, and trust to others. If this is truly my Birthday, let us celebrate likewise,” and loafs of bread appeared in His hands.

Jesus moved to the altar and broke the bread into small pieces for everyone to consume. The minister assisted by pouring wine.

“Here, eat and drink. Do this for the remembrance of Me. My message is simple: I love you unconditionally. You may not believe in me, but have confidence that I love you. Do not dwell in hate. Practice love and do unto others as you would have others do unto you. It’s really not that difficult, is it?”

As the last morsel of bread was consumed and wine drunk, He turned and disappeared into the ether with the exclamation, “Remember!”

Keep the Faith!

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NEXT UP: 2013 YEAR-END WRAP-UP – My most popular columns this year.

LAST TIME: ALL IS FAIR IN LOVE AND WAR…AND POLITICS – How the office of the president has been reshaped.

Personal Peccadilloes

August 14, 2013 by TimBryce

BRYCE ON FAMILY & TRAVEL

– Why we behave the way we do under close quarters.

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Holidays such as Thanksgiving and Christmas typically bring members of the family together, as does family vacations and anniversaries. Inevitably, family members open their homes and share quarters with loved ones traveling from out of town. Perhaps you’ll go home to see your parents and stay in your old room or stay with one of your siblings. Such close quarters are certainly appreciated, but they also have a tendency to drive people crazy, both the host and the guest, regardless how much we love our family.

As creatures of habit, we all have our own unique set of nuances we like to live by, particularly at home. Such habits may seem insignificant, but we begin to feel inhibited when we try to live in close quarters with someone else. In other words, we have to be on our best behavior and cannot truly relax as we normally would. To illustrate:

* Meal time can be awkward as people have different eating customs. For example, some people will eat a hearty breakfast, others something simple, and some not at all. Some like coffee, others want tea or just some juice of some kind. It all makes for some awkward moments for people in the kitchen. Some people like to eat strange snacks and consume beverages during off hours. What is normal to one person appears strange to others. The time at which we eat can also become an issue, as well as the types of food and restaurants we like. Trying to plan an evening dinner to accommodate everyone’s tastes and timetables can become as complicated as planning D-Day.

* In terms of bathroom decorum we have to observe different customs of using the shower, the “facilities,” towels and trash, and general cleanliness. Some people are slobs, others are neat freaks, neither of which are compatible.

* Even the act of washing clothes can become awkward. Some people like to wash small loads, others large. Then there is the matter of the water temperature and the amount of detergent to use. I realize it sounds rather petty, but such nuances drive some people crazy.

* Then there is the matter of what clothes to wear for certain occasions. Regardless of how old you are, your mother will inevitably comment, “You’re not going out dressed like that are you?” Even the comfortable clothes you want to wear around the house comes under scrutiny.

* Maintaining the bedroom can also become a problem. Some people like to live in pigpens, others are more tidy. Believe me, the differences between hosts and guests are considerable. Some hosts insist on sacrificing their own bedrooms to allow their guests maximum comfort. Inevitably, guests cannot relax in fear they may do something wrong in the inner sanctum, and hosts toss and turn uncomfortably on sleep sofas with metal bars sticking in their spines. It’s a no-win scenario no matter what you do.

* There are many other idiosyncrasies observed, such as talking too much or too little or at the wrong time, smoking, imbibing a drink, eating too much or too little, what you eat versus what you don’t, how you exercise (or not), how the coffee is made, what vitamins and medication you are taking, what you watch on television, what time you rise in the morning and retire at night, even how you drive your own car.

We all have unique peculiarities we like to live by and when we get together with family members we try to bite our tongues for the sake of harmony. However, I’ve observed some people are more accommodating than others. If you are the guest, you have to respect the wishes of your hosts, and; if you are the hosts, you have to tolerate the nuances of your guests. Compromise is the order of the day in such situations. You do not want to become an intruding pest regardless of the role you are playing.

In the end, we are all greatly relieved when the family disperses and everyone returns home. Guests are delighted to return to the routine of their own domain, and hosts are relieved to see their households return to normal.

We don’t really want to become pests to other people, but because of our peculiarities we cannot help it. Perhaps the worst thing though is to overstay your welcome and get under the skin of your family. If you are going to be in close quarters for an extended period of time, let me suggest you do it on neutral ground, such as in a hotel in another city, or on a cruise ship, where someone else will be charged with looking after your foibles. Otherwise, it is not uncommon for family members to start bickering amongst themselves, gossiping, and animosity inevitably grows into rage. This is why we should avoid “family” restaurants; there’s a fight at every table. Such is the price of our personal peccadilloes.

Keep the Faith!

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For Tim’s columns, see:
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Listen to Tim on WJTN-AM (News Talk 1240) “The Town Square” with host John Siggins (Mon, Wed, Fri, 12:30-3:00pm Eastern), KGAB-AM 650 “The Morning Zone” with host Dave Chaffin (weekdays, 6:00-10:00am Mountain), and KIT-AM 1280 in Yakima, Washington “The Morning News” with hosts Lance Tormey & Brian Teegarden (weekdays. 6:00-9:00am Pacific). Or tune-in to Tim’s channel on YouTube.

Print On-Demand (POD) – Very Cool

August 7, 2013 by TimBryce

BRYCE ON TECHNOLOGY

– Finally, a “do it yourself” approach for book publishing.

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I know eBooks have made substantial gains in terms of popularity, but having a hard copy can still be very beneficial. There are many people who like the touch and feel of paper versions. In the past, if you were an author, you had to sign a contract with a suitable printer or publisher who could put it all together for you. This usually meant you or your publisher had to maintain an inventory of books. If you had a best seller, you would simply reorder stock, but if it didn’t, the books (and your cash) would sit on the shelf gathering dust.

Recently, I produced a new book entitled, “Stand Up for MORALITY.” I discussed the project with my local printer. He advised me to try a new service called, “Create Space,” a “Print On-Demand” (POD) service, and a subsidiary of Amazon. Frankly, I knew nothing about it, but after exploring the web site I figured I had nothing to lose and opened an account. The intent of the site was to provide a convenient way to publish books yourself.

Create Space requires you to upload a PDF file representing your manuscript. Fortunately, I have been well versed in desktop publishing for a number of years and know how to create a PDF file, so this didn’t present a problem to me. To others though, this can be their biggest problem in using the service. If you know how to use a word processor or desktop publishing tool, and convert your work to a PDF file, you’ll do well. Otherwise, I would recommend you hire someone to layout your book for you.

After you have submitted the manuscript, an electronic analysis is performed to check layout problems which you should be able to easily correct. While that is going on, you can design your book cover. This can be done either as a separate PDF upload, as a selected template from a catalog they make available, or you can request professional assistance, which they will gladly perform for a fee. I tried uploading my own cover and also used a template (on another book) and was happy with both approaches.

As part of the initial setup, you must also input an ISBN number, either one you selected yourself, or they will get one for you (for a modest fee), and will automatically create a shopping bar code which is affixed on the back cover.

When you are ready with both the manuscript and cover, the book is assembled and submitted for review by an analyst at Create Space. This process takes approximately 24 hours. As a warning, do not submit your book prematurely; take your time, and make sure you go into the review process with confidence. Otherwise you’ll have to go through another 24 hour review cycle, or maybe a third or fourth.

Assuming acceptance, your book is now ready to be published on-demand. This means you can start marketing the book yourself. Better yet, let Amazon and Create Space use their marketing arms to help you. Of course, there will be royalties for their efforts, but it may be worth it. As the author, you are entitled to purchase books at a reduced rate. The best part is, no inventory. Books are printed on-demand, packaged, and shipped directly to customers in a very timely manner. Create Space also provides the means to create and market an eBook if you are so inclined.

Even though I discovered it only recently, the Print On-Demand (POD) technology has been around for ten years and is steadily improving. Although I used Create Space, there are other offerings available. I selected Create Space for two reasons: it’s relationship to publishing giant Amazon, and because of the service’s ease of use. Frankly, I was impressed by the quality and service.

So, next time you have a book in mind, be it large or small, and you are familiar with desktop publishing, be sure to check out POD Technology, particularly Create Space. I’ve already turned some of my author buddies on to it and they enjoy it immensely. As they all said, it’s “Very Cool!”

Keep the Faith!

Note: All trademarks both marked and unmarked belong to their respective companies.

For Tim’s columns, see:
timbryce.com

Like the article? TELL A FRIEND.

Listen to Tim on WJTN-AM (News Talk 1240) “The Town Square” with host John Siggins (Mon, Wed, Fri, 12:30-3:00pm Eastern), KGAB-AM 650 “The Morning Zone” with host Dave Chaffin (weekdays, 6:00-10:00am Mountain), and KIT-AM 1280 in Yakima, Washington “The Morning News” with hosts Lance Tormey & Brian Teegarden (weekdays. 6:00-9:00am Pacific). Or tune-in to Tim’s channel on YouTube.